The What If? EP

by Zach Taul

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about

This is an album I've been working on since the release of The Second One. Its kind of like album 2.5, but its mostly acoustic. I am really excited to release these songs. I enjoy them very dearly and I hope you do as well. As soon as I finished the Second One, so much shit happened to where i could not stop writing music at the time. It started with just one or two songs, but then I finally decided to write some more as time went on and more shit happened in my life. This album has some varying themes, kind of like moving on, the future scaring you and most importantly, not making a move or a decision when you really wanted to. Its about thinking about scenarios if you did do something. What if? The what if complex! So here is 5 acoustic songs and a heavier closer, so happy birthday, enjoy the media and have fun.

credits

released November 21, 2016

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Track Name: The Night Before
faster than i know it
i turned form a hero to 0
and how could a night
be the best there was
but also be the worst
it swiftly changed from gain to pain
i see the good from
the photos i took the day before
but all i can remember is the fucking misery

i woke up this morning
withdrawing from nicotine
that i came addicted to
the night before holy fucking shit
smoking to keep the thoughts
from turning bad as they turned and turned
and all i want is a fucking cigarette
and for me to remember the good of the night

now i realize
nothing i do or say
is going to go my way
now i realize
all I've dreamt of and hoped
is all just a waste of time

(i should be happy )
i helped make you happy
even though it kills me
you have somebody that makes you
as happy as you make me
You have cute boys to talk and talk about but I'm sitting here with my mouth shut because i don't want to ruin your happiness of how you're feeling
Track Name: The Future is Scaring the Shit Out of Me
and nothings going my way
cause its all the same day
i dont know if i can
take it for much longer
cause i know that its coming
and i know i cant stop it
cause its about about to get really bad

its about to get really bad

im not sure how long that i
can continue now
my life in shambles
im finding it harder and harder
to find the reason
to keep going on

how can i go on
but I'm gonna try my best
as everything just crumbles around me
its gonna gonna bad

its about to get really bad

everything i know is falling down
falling down around me
fallind down and around and round
Track Name: Leaving Away Without a Word
waiting before the show
caught up in the pit
pushed up against the rail
after SWMRS the rail opened
and i jumped on the opportunity
right there next to you

waiting for the show
at the FIDLAR concert
asking if you're ok
as your glass flew off
you're face past the rail
oh god are you ok?

rocking out, singing songs
holding onto for dear life
trying not to loose my spot
standing there next to you
smack me in the face with your sweaty bun
but its ok i don't care

leaving away without a word
as you're hoping for a setlist
leaving away without a word
as i see you by the door
leaving away without a word
wishing id asked you
for your number before the night was over
but that ok i had a good time
Track Name: What If?
what if i talked to you
i told you you looked cute
i had the same beanie as you
i thought you were cool as hell

what if you also like me the same way
and i just didn't know it or had a clue

what if i told you
that i had a crush on you
i told you in the car
i spilled myself out for you

what if i had
faith in god restored
would my life be fixed
and not so filled with shit

What if my life was fixed and swell and
nobody hated me like i hate myself

what if was
confident and happy
all would be okay
and falling into place

and I'm facing with this parallel
of thoughts id wish id say
its constant thoughts nagging
but its all hypothetical
the complex that I have
missed my opportunity
i wish id know
it'd make a difference

What if
I wasn't so mentally ill
what if
i knew what to say next
what if
I wasn't so chicken shit to make the first move and tell someone how i feel
what if
my life wasn't so fucked and i could do one right thing and not fuck it up
im left her wondering about all the things in my life i didn't do and it fucking kills me to think and think about the shit I could have done but i didn't
and I'm hopeless x3
Track Name: New Beginnings, Again
and I'm wishing for a change of… pacing
and I'm wishing for some sort of sign… give me shelter
and I'm wishing for the days to feel good… like they used to
wanting to feel something normal… like I've needed

and you just wish that its all fine… but its not
and i want to feel something other than… hate and pain
but its all gonna feel the same… over next time
i want to finished all this shit… starting fresh

and all is forgiven, today… another week
of not knowing what my next step is… living large
living like I'm something that I'm not… I'm happy
for all those that have their life together… unlike me
im in a state of anxiety and im…think that
its gonna be alright its gonna be fine… so I'm told
trust me when i say that its gonna get better… i still care
i dont want you to feel hopeless… I'm still here

And what is said is just another…. mistake
from what is told and what is heard… not again
and I'm just wishing to say something… to you
start over the same story again… here we go

and i don't wish to say anything to you
cause ill run my mouth and ruin it again
one step. two step. three step. four. over
here comes another day of anxiety
Track Name: I'm Fine
Whats the fucks wrong with me! x4
I cant keep living with myself
what the fucks wrong with me x4
I cant keep living with myself
Maybe next time ill change enough to be a good person where i wont fuck up the simplest shit and ill stop hating myself, EVEN THOUGH! i keep telling myself i will but I'm lying to myself that its all fine. ITs all fine. ITS ALL FINE! ITS ALL FINE! ITS ALL FINE! ITS ALL FINE! ITS ALL FINE! ITS ALL FINE! ITS ALL FINE